So this one’s for Alick!

Make the leap & the net will appear!

Ok not as we discussed yesterday being uncomfortable is a good thing as that means your moving forward! I want to add to that! When your at that crucial point when your deciding if you should go and speak with a women, just before you make a decision remember this! If you don’t shoot you don’t score! If never try you will never know. Ok she could say no go away or just ignore you! But that’s her bad not yours! The fact of the matter is you made a step forward to took action to improve you love life, if anything you should be laughing at her for not being ready to take her life forward, but don’t just let her, do her!

Also remember If you jump the net will appear!!!!

Until next time
Darren

Until next time take action!

Darren

Of course you have!

Well this is possible. A lot of guys say It’s not a good thing to be in the “friends” zone now while this is true of a girl you want it can be a positive.

I make a point of becoming friends with really hot women, and they surprisingly have really hot friends too! Now your hot friend will naturally suggest her hot friends to take out and date. Not only that, she will show what to wear, how to act and how to be more desirable to hot women!

So give it a go get into the friends zone!

Cute Approach

I know exactly where your coming from, as that was me only a couple of months ago. Get this I was a DJ that couldn’t get a girl how bad it that. I was constantly surrounded by beautiful girls and just didn’t have the confidence to do anything about it. I even remember one occasion where a girl asked me what I was doing after the club and when did me set finish and I still couldn’t make a move, bad times!

However after years of this crippling fear of approaching and speaking to girls, and just being miserable at the end of each night, watching all the other guys who just seemed to get it! I decided to do research and find out how to become better at dating, and what happened in the following 4 months has seriously changed my life.

One of the main things I realized is that, we as men don’t actually fear approaching a women. What we really fear is the rejection that could happen. For instance let me take you through the thought process that most men have when seeing an hot women. ” OK she’s hot I really want to go talk to her, she seems like a lot of fun” ( ok so far, but then see what happens when our sub-conscious kicks in). ” Ahh but what if she thinks I’m weird for just walking up to her, or what if she has a boyfriend, or what if I’m not her type or what if she just humiliates me in front of everyone by saying “just go away freak”!!!!!!! See how hard this becomes now! What was a simple hey I just wanted to come and say I think you look really cute and just wanted to let you know, suddenly becomes, a queen bitch’s personal attack on you in front of the whole room! This doesn’t need to happen but I will explain why it does, and its all subconscious!

Here’s a quick insight into a woman’s mind – Women just like us men subconsciously when looking for a mate still have the criteria of the Neanderthals, this is due to millions of years of evaluation and social conditioning. Women despite what they might tell you want a strong, independent, protector. They want a man to be in control of her and himself. They want a man who knows what he wants and has a spine and wont give into her every request. Here’s an example I call it the “Bad Boy Effect”. You will have noticed that the “Bad Boys” get all the hot girls, but why is this. Well this is because they generally cant and wont be told what to do, they tend to be very confident, and self sure, and also do not cave in to all the requests of the women. This strong, independent and confident character is what a women is really after. No over the past few years women have become far more powerful in the gender roles, we now have stay at home dads and female CEO’s. None of this is bad, but what it has done over the last 20-30 years is to change the psyche of us men to believing women don’t need us, but my friend they do just as much as we need them.

Strong and confident

So how do I become this character that all the girls want? Well don’t just go and get yourself a motor bike and start smashing up bars lol, because that part of the bad boy is not a turn on!

You can begin with the simple your “cute approach“, this works a charm and builds your confidence no end!

Ok what i did to build my confidence and help me develop my game was two things 1st was this cute approach and the second I will tell you about in a minute. Ok so with the cute approach, the whole aim is to build your confidence by talking to hot women. It’s ok calm down, its very simple. You are going to approach a women not to get a date, a number or even a conversation but to just tell her she looks really cute. Ok so for instance say your walking past a coffee shop and there is a really cute girl sitting out side with a coffee reading or talking to her friend, just simply walk over and say, ” Excuse me I saw you and thought you looked really cute and I just had to come and tell you”. That’s it!  She will normally laugh or say thank you. Now at this point if your feeling playful and think you can carry the conversation on. You could say something like “Ok this is the point, where you say, your not to bad yourself or your kinda hot too” and just keep her laughing and keep this conversation fun! Or for this first couple of approaches just walk away! Simple

Ok as I’m sure a lot of you are aware, a lot of so called dating guru’s have been telling everyone for a while the you need to work out a routine or you need to have an opener that you use all the time. Some even suggest using cards tricks to engage women. All of the above do work, but not as well a natural game. I mean having an opener is great it cuts out the worry of “what am I going to say”. However what if your opener doesn’t work if your stood in line at the bank or if your walking out of the cinema. There will be dozens of opportunities missed by only having a certain amount of openers. Well unless your Derren Brown and could remember over a hundred off the top of your head, which I doubt lol

What I need to stress to you is how important “Natural Game” is.

Some of you may even be asking what the heck is natural game? Well it’s the difference between a guy that walks into a hotel reception or bar and tries to work the women, and a guy that walks in and has the women want to come over to him!

A guy with natural game will, walk differently, talk differently, and just be different!

So how do I get natural game? Well there is no big red button that turns it on but I will break down the 3 key elements to it!

1) Confidence – Now we have discussed this before. Confidence is perceived by women by how you act around them. A few posts a go we discussed about putting women on a pedestal and how this gives them the power. Don’t stop it. The question I want you to say to your self when your next around a hot women is, “Is she worth my time?” Ask your self if she wasn’t good looking would I hang round with her? What can she offer me besides a beautiful body to have sex with? I’m being serious guys. As you ask yourself this question you will start to feel her becoming more and more human, and you know why? Because she is. Guy’s go and set up a profile on any on-line dating site and read what the women put they want from a man. The top 3 things are humor, excitement and trust. Unlike us guy’s they really don’t give a damme about looks. So have a shower, clean your shoes, brush your teeth, and iron your clothes and you have the same chance every other guy does!

2) Communication -  Being able to communicate well with a women will turn her on faster than the new Gucci hand bag. The reason for this is simple. Both male and female’s subconscious programming dates back to the cave man period. Back then the men would go off in small  groups and hunt while the women stayed at home. The women would talk for hours constantly to A) stop them selves being board and B) to keep animals at bay around the fire at night. The men would have short burst of grunts and shouts as to not scare the animals they were hunting. Now do you understand why women love to talk, it’s hard wired my friend. But now you know what 95% of most men don’t, so use it. When speaking with a women LISTEN and I mean LISTEN to what she is saying and reply to it. Don’t sit there and try to think of the next thing to say that will impress her or try and jump in and tell her about your brand new sexy fast car. this will just turn her off. Sit, listen and respond to what she is actually saying. For example if she says ” I have always wanted to go to Thailand because the beaches there are made of white sand and moon shines so brightly”. You could respond with something like. ” Wow that sounds incredible. I have never been but the thought of kicking back in a hammock while the sunsets on a white sandy beach, really appeals to me”! Listen to what she says, respond and indulge her senses that brings me on to step 3.

The senses

3) Evoke her senses – Women are emotion, sensual beings and love nothing more then than their senses indulged. Now this a way of showing you are a sexually attractive man without being smutty and crude. The way in which you do certain things will indicate to a women if you are good in bed. Such as the way you describe food and tell stories and of course dance. If you were to tell her about a meal you recently had say at your favorite Italian. You could say the spaghetti Bolognese is really nice. But that would get her senses involved. A more exciting way to say it would be, the pasta they serve is so very tender, and the herb and tomato sauce they serve it with really gets your taste buds tingling. Even the garlic bread is to shout about, when you bite into it the garlic butter oozes into your mouth! You see it’s sexier! Another way of getting her senses involved into a conversation is to lower your voice and slow you speech. This will make your voice naturally deeper, and the slowing down of your speech will project confidence. Also whisper into her ear, this shows your comfortable in close proximity to her, plus women subconsciously relate whispers to making love.

If you really want to see a great display of natural game and see how a guy, walks, talks and acts that has great natural game. Get a copy of oceans 11, 12 and 13 and study, Brad Pitt and George Clooney. It;s just genius!

And very importantly how to get a grip of my confidence. I now have now fear when approaching women, in fact i love it and so will you the more you learn from this blog!

Ok in this post i am going to be delving into the complex or (so we thought), mind of the female!

Over the past few months i have being doing some further study into the thoughts and feelings of women, mainly when it come to attraction and dating, and what i have discovered is astounding! Even more so than I originally thought!

Findings

Ok, well a common misconception of most men is that to get a beautiful women’s attention you need to be either, Rich, Incredibly good looking, Drive a fast car,  know 101 pick up lines or all of the afore mentioned. The truth is guys it’s all a myth!

Sure there are some women that go for guys with a big bank balance or the fast car but it’s not the money or the car that attracts them it’s what they stand for and convey. Generally speaking men with money are very confident, they have little to worry about and are in control! Women LOVE confidence & a men that they feel is in control!

The reason for this stems way back to when we all used to live in caves and men were the hunter gatherers and women the home makes and took care of the children. We all, men and women still have these subconscious thought cycles hard wired into our minds, that are triggered when the opposite sex, does, looks, acts, says or smells a certain way!

Women genetically are looking for somebody to protect them, who is of strong character, confidant within them selves and is comfortable being around women. When we as shy guys with are nervous body language, our tendency to not to be able to hold eye contact or lack of ability to approach women. We do not give off the confident, strong signals! Where as the guys who have mastered their confidence and feel worthy of women will inevitably give off in ridiculous amounts the signals that flip on the attraction switches for women!

Here’s a sight i’m sure you’ve see a hundred times, your in a bar, a mall or a restaurant, a beautiful woman walks by. She’s so hot that everyones attention is on her, even the women’s eyes are looked onto her! Then out of nowhere an either geeky or just ugly guy is on her arm. Now two thoughts come to mind usually with men and that is either he’s loaded or his penis is 12 inches long. Well guy’s generally neither is true although props to him if her has either!

What this guy has done is flipped, this women’s attraction switch on. So forget needing to buy a fast car, forget having to be rich, and forget every pick up line ever, you don’t need them. All you will ever need is to be able to turn on a women’s attraction switch!

I’n my next post we will be discovering what are women’s attraction switches and how YOU can turn them on!

As ever any questions please Click Here to contact me

Until next time

Darren

In the last post Talking With your Body part 3 we discussed about how your confidence or lack of that could be holding you back from your beauty in the corner. We discussed & maybe some of you have had a few realizations and discovered that it’s not approaching women that scare you it’s the fear of rejection that scares the pants of you!

Today we are going to go into more depth about confidence it’s self and how we can gain more so that we may be able to go out into the field and date the women we want to date, without fear, anxiety, and frustration! I will be showing you one technique in particular called the “Burn and Relearn Method”

Resent studies have shown that number 1 on woman’s list of things they find attractive in men is Confidence. Which makes sense when you think about it. Let’s think about the psychology of women and what makes them tick. Psychologists say that our own brains are still subconsciously in cycles from the neanderthal times, where the man was the protector and the women was the poor defenseless home maker. So what todays women actually feel subconsciously towards a confident man is security, she feels secure around him and this enables her to relax, be herself and enjoy her time with him. This is why we want to become confident so that women will be relaxed and be themselves around us!

We have previously looked at how to look confident but how do we actually become confident inside? Well we are going to start by using the Burn and Relearn Method. Get a piece of paper and draw a line down the middle of it. On the left hand side write down all your doubts you have about approaching women.

A quick story. I used to have the shy guy problem and would physically FEAR rejection so badly i wouldn’t go out clubbing, just in case my friends were like dude she’s checking you out go over to her! I used to look at the beautiful girls and think “what could i offer her?” ” She wouldn’t be interested in me” and my favorite ” She’s outta my league”! Well NO one is out of your league this i promise you. You can and will have any girl you want if you learn you become the confident you!

Ok so fill the left side of the paper with doubts you have about approaching women, for instance fear of rejection, not knowing what to talk about, does she want me to talk to her, am i good enough for her ect.

Now on the right hand side of the paper, you are going to right down the NEW FEELINGS you want when go to approach a women. How good do you want to feel, when you spot a girl in a bar at the deli or at the post office and just think i like her, I’m going for it, with no hesitation at all! You could want to feel excited and confident. Or great that you don’t feel insecure and great because you know what you are going to say.

Ok so now we have a piece of paper with doubts on the left and the way we want to feel on the right. Above the doubts title that side The Old Me and the rights side title The New Me. Now repeat after me ” My old me used to have doubts about approaching women such as ( read out your doubts), but now i know that these are all false and that when i approach girls my new me will feel ( read out feelings you want to feel). I want you to read this to your self for the next week twice a day. This may sound and feel a bit mumbo jumbo, but what is actually going on is you are reprogramming your brain to think differently and I’ll tell you why. This new way of thinking will bring new results because it will create new neurons in the brain that will fire when you think of talking to a girl instead of the old ones. The subconscious loves repetition so by reading this ALOUD twice a day it will help it sink into your subconscious and change your outlook when approaching women, which in turn will increase your confidence.

After the 7 days is up i want you to cut the piece of paper down the middle. You will have now separated the doubts and new feelings you want. Take the doubts piece of paper and BURN it, destroy it. It no longer has a place in your life that was the old you. The new, sexy, confidence, outgoing, marvelous you is here and here to stay, so BURN it. (this part feels great) Ok doubts are burnt, now with the “new feelings paper” say once a day out-loud, ” The feelings i will have when i approach a women will be (list feelings), do this everyday for the next month, together with reading my blog and products to learn how to talk and approach women and watch as you confidence soars!

I really hope that you take the steps above a follow through with them as this has been one of my best ways of improving my confidence and remember you are a great guy, now go and show them why!

As always and questions email me: Click Here

Until next

Darren

Well in this installment we are going to look into building confidence within you and looking confident on the outside, because as much as people deny it the two are related!

Ok so how to we go from a Shy Guy to a confident guy???

Well were going to start with YOU, yes that’s right you. The reason i believe we are shy or afraid of speaking with beautiful women is one of two things. We either do think we can offer these girls anything, the old saying ” what will she want with me?” comes to mind. Man i’ve used that to death. And the other reason is we are afraid  of what people with think of us if or when we get rejected by these beautiful women!

But what both of these reasons equates to is fear of REJECTION! Now i know i harp on about this bad boy all the time but hey, this is the one and only reason that Shy Guys fail with women.

However this is a good thing! Yes i say good thing! It is far easier to learn how become more confident then be over confident, cocky and arrogant!

Ok so were afraid of rejection, well step one is to think about this very scenario for a second. Ok lets say you go over to a really hot girl, and you say hey my names James, can i buy you a drink? She says now but you can leave now! and her friends giggle. What you have to realize that this isn’t you with bad game this is you running into a complete BITCH and even the best pick up artists would have to pull out there best moves to defrost this ice queen!

Get over it, so what if she blows you off, so what if she snubs you, so what, so what, so what? Your still alive, you can still walk, you can go and speak to another women. And you still live in the knowledge that your a decent human being. The fact that she blew you off could have been hundreds of different things. Like she’s had a bad day at work, 3 ass holes could have tried picking her up just before you went over and she just wants to be left alone. It’s not always you dude!

Ok, first thing i want you to do is, practice walking with your shoulders back, with chest out and head up! While doing this think of a comedy sketch that just cracks you up every time!  This is to help show you feel good and puts a smile on your face. A smile will increase your attraction by 100% compared to not smiling! So smile be happy, lifes good!

Now when we walk, we walk slower. Take in your surroundings! Confident guys don’t rush, their in control, they take their time, the world works to help them! So take your time. One great tip i can give you as well is if you walk into somewhere like a bar or shop, look the girls in the eyes for a few seconds and then move onto the next girl, as we discussed last time the importance of eye contact is immeasurable. Have you ever wanted to be that guy that walks into the bar and all the groups of girls start talking about you, this is a little way to begin to create that “who’s that guy” moment and boy what a confidence booster that is.

Ok that will do for this post as i want you to go and practice the above. As usual any issues you wana chat about contact me by clicking HERE

Untill next time

Darren

Hope you have taken in what we discussed last time, about eye contact, smiling, holding yourself correctly and noticing her body language and beginning to read it!

This will inevitably help you improve your confidence as you will know she wants you to come over a flirt with her!!!

In this post we will be going into more detail on specifics of body language:

Ok now if your reading this then you were once like me “Mr Shy Guy”, you see a really cute girl and you really, really want to go and chat with her. Unfortunately the fear kicks in and totally immobilizes you and you basically just freeze! I know i’ve been there and it’s the worst thing ever, because all you can say to your self is if only i could speak with her, if only!

But what were all really afraid of and what that fear we feel is REJECTION. Were afraid that if we go over and speak with a beautiful women, that we wont even register on her radar and she will just snub us!

Now i know not many if any of you have experienced this because, your afraid to go and find out, and hey it’s not a problem 75% of men say they are scared of a women rejecting them.

What I am going to teach you in this and the next few posts is the basics of Body Language – How attract that beauty in the corner with your body!!!!

Ok so let set up the useful scene. Your in a bar and you turn round and notice this gorgeous women by the bar. You want to go and talk to her but you freeze, you get the fear of rejection ect, ect.

So how to we get rid of this fear!!!!

Well what we need to do is establish if the girl is interested in us first.

So we need create attraction with our body!!!

Firstly we need you to relax because i know what you do you see the girl start thinking about approaching her and tense up, as i have said in  my last post women are like poker players, now wait amazing poker players they are far better at reading body language then we can even imagine. So if your nervous, scared and tense this will show through your subconscious body language.

First take a DEEP breath, hold it in (don’t suffocate) then exhale. repeat this 3 times this will release the tension in your shoulders and your chest!

Ok now start moving, walk around a little wiggle your fingers, and laugh! Think of something that cracks you up, maybe your favorite comic has a gag that just kills you every time you here it. Think of that and laugh.  When we laugh we dissipate any tension or unease we have in our body and also,it’s been proven that a person smiling looks 85% more attractive than if your not. I think this is because we want to be around happy people and people that are going to make us happy! makes sense really!

Ok so how can we tell if she’s interested?

Well first we need to make eye contact, this is the crucial first step. Look over at her catch her eyes and hold her gaze for about 4 seconds, look away for 4 seconds and then look back at her for 4 seconds.

If she is interested and likes the look of you she may do a number of things, the obvious is smile at you! If she smiles make sure she shows her teeth as when we are genuinely and excited we show our teeth when we smile. Also she may flick her hair or twirl her hair around her finger this is the look at me i’m playing coy move, she is trying to so she is available! Another sign is for the women to move her hiar to one side of her neck exposing her neck which is a erogenous zone and shows

vulnerability!!! A classic is for her to start to run her fingers across her chest or hold her hand on her chest.

What we need to remember with body language is not to take each of the above signal in isolation as they may just be habits she has. You need to look for a group of movements, such as when you  look at her for the second time she may begin twirling her hair, smile and run her fingers across her chest.

If you see these signs smile back and see if her she smiles or carries on smiling. If so then you in!!!!!!

In my next post i will be exposing some more tell, tell signs she LIKES YOU and how to improve your chances with her using your body!!

Untill next time!!

Remember all you have to fear is fear it’s self!!!

So what have I been up to?

Well i have been doing a lot of research on psychology, and more importantly the psychology of both the male and female mind. In order to find out what makes some guys more able to attract girls?

This post is going to focus on body language and the way we conduct our selves when in the company of a girl we like.

Along with my research i have been talking with women as well. Recently i spoke with a few of my sisters friends who gave me a big in site into the female mind!!!

I initially asked them “so what would be the best way for a man to approach you”?

The reply was both interesting, yet very surprising. They said that they can tell a mile off what a guy is thinking by his body language and the way he holds himself. After doing a little research into this i have found out that women can read body language 50% better then us men. Fact women love body language!

So with this i mind i delved further into the question what would be the best way to approach a women? The girls said that it normally starts with eye contact. You notice somebody, noticing you and take if from there. I asked what could a man do with this eye contact that would make him more attractive to you? The answer was keep eye contact, this is a must. Once you see her looking at you lock into her stare, smile and slightly squint and i mean slightly dont make it look like you have something in your eye lol. And do not look away until she does.

Ok so we have now established that you are interested in her, what we need to do now is see if she gives you any signals to invite you over. Apparently one of the classics if shes at the bar is to turn her back to you and rest on the bar, as she wants you to approach her and stand next to her. Another more subtle one is to run her fingers through her hair or tuck it behind her ear.

The next question i asked the girls keeping in mind women love body language was, ” ok so just by looking at a man what would be something that would make him attractive”? The answer that came from almost every girl was “confidence”, this single factor is what 99.9% of women feel they need to see when they look at a man to find him attractive. What we need to remember is that psychologically both men and women are still if the pre-historic thought pattern that men go out and hunt and women stay at home, cook and clean. So a strong confident man really appeals to women.

Ok so how do we look confident? Well several things can be done to achieve this. Firstly always walk with your shoulders back and your back straight and smile, yes that’s right smile. Smiling is one of the most attractive things that you can do. It shows, your happy, your enjoying your self and the truth is that people want to be around happy people! Ok next thing to make our selves look more attractive is chill out and slow down, this dynamically improves your attractiveness, just look at guys like Steve Mcqueen, James Bond, Will smith, Brad Pitt. The word COOL comes to mind and slowing down everything like your walk, your hand gestures, how you grab your drink, put it to you lips and drink it and then put it down will inevitably make you look cooler. At first your will have to consciously think about this but eventually it will become second nature.

Well i hope that has given you enough to think about, and try out.

Things to try out

Eye contact – Just try holding eye contact with a girl and see if you can hold it until she looks away first!

Slowing down – Try slowing your walk down, your hand gestures and small things like drinking your drink. ( don’t over kill this and look like your in slowmo though lol – be sensible maybe add a few seconds onto drinking your drink)

Smiling – Studies have shown that people that smile, look more attractive, attract more women and generally feel better about themselves.

Give them ago and let me know how you get on!

Until next time

Darren